You know that war you have been fighting with your body for as long as you can remember? Well I had finally had enough of it by the age of 37. I was a new mom of twin boys and I was exhausted. Having twins at 35 was no joke. They never got the memo to grow like twins and I ended up picking up 70 kgs during my pregnancy. 8kgs of baby and two placentas made for a very uncomfortable ride. The day I gave birth I weighed 138kgs. My feet fell flat, my hair, skin and nails were broken and I was a complete mess. Being the owner of a weight loss company only served to fuel feelings of failure and desperation. I felt miserable. I used to joke and say I looked like "Fiona swallowed Shrek".
My weight gain completely overshadowed the joy I should have felt for finally being pregnant and giving birth to two healthy baby boys. I didn't want any photos taken of me and I hid from the world. There was no lovely pregnancy shoot and when it was time to do my baby shoot I refused to be in the pictures with them. So many precious memories that I now sit without. My daily dose of self hatred spilled over into every single area of my life. And I sometimes wished my partner could read my mind and see this inward battle I was facing. Something had to change. This could not go on. But what was the answer. Another strict deprivation cycle, swinging from extreme to extreme, starting a new program every Monday? I was done with fad diets. I needed a true lifestyle overhaul that could work for my entire family. I wanted my kids to grow up with a mom that walked the talk. Someone who was present in every photo, game, holiday or family activity. I had to take control of my mind , body and spirit.
And so the quest to true balance, self love, health and happiness started and our "Ditch the Diet Revolution" program was born. It is a culmination of every little step I had to take on my journey along with 10 years of experience. Today my goals look very different. I live in total gratitude for each moment, I know that I am good enough, I know that if I fuel my body, it serves me so beautifully. I get stronger and stronger every day in every way.
The scale is a contraption that I step on and not a true measure of what is going on inside me and most certainly doesn't hold the key to my happiness or my worth. 60kgs down and counting and laughing, singing, dancing and living all the way.